We extend a special welcome to those who are single, married,
widowed, divorced, gay, filthy rich, dirt poor, yo no habla Ingles.
We extend a special welcome to those who are crying new-borns,
skinny as a rail or could afford to
lose a few pounds.
We welcome you if you can sing like Andrea Bocelli or like a person
who can’t carry a note in a bucket. You’re welcome here if you’re
“just browsing,” just woke up or just got out of jail. We don’t care
if you’re more Catholic than the Pope, or haven’t been in church
since little Joey’s Baptism.
We extend a special welcome to those who are over 60 but not
grown up yet, and to teenagers who are growing up too fast. We welcome
soccer moms, NASCAR dads, starving artists, tree-huggers, latte-sippers,
vegetarians, junk-food eaters. We welcome those who are in recovery
or still addicted. We welcome you if you’re having problems or you’re
down in the dumps or if you don’t like “organized religion;” we’ve been
If you blew all your offering money at the dog track, you’re welcome here.
We offer a special welcome to those who think the earth is flat, work
too hard, don’t work, can’t spell, or because grandma is in town and
wanted to go to church.
We welcome those who are inked, pierced or both. We offer a special
welcome to those who could use a prayer right now, had religion
shoved down your throat as a kid or got lost in traffic and wound up
here by mistake. We welcome tourists, seekers and doubters,
bleeding hearts... and you!